It’s my last day in the States and I’m stressed, excited, nervous, tired, but…I’m ready. I feel a little better, now that I’ve packed for Italy, but there’s still a lot of pressure with all of my friends wanting to see me before I leave. It doesn’t help that I have a 7 a.m. flight, which means I have to be at the LAX airport by 4:30 or 5 a.m.

Planning the perfect outfit for the plane ride was on my mind. Italians take fashion very seriously. In my previous experiences in Italian airports, everyone is dressed to the nines in everything from Gucci and Prada to Ralph Lauren and Marc Jacobs. Designer clothes are everything to Italians. That and shoes. They notice your shoes before they care to acknowledge you as a human being. Granted, that doesn’t go for ALL Italians, but it is true for most.

Matt is taking me out to a lovely (and early, given my flight time) dinner this evening: a goodbye dinner of sorts. I’ve imagined a romantic goodbye, but unfortunately I can’t dress the part. I had on a plum top and comfortable stretchy black pants that I’d been running around in all day, and I didn’t have time to change into a sexy dress. I’m nervous to say goodbye to him. What kind of goodbye is it? Is it “you’re kind of my boyfriend, I’ll miss you endlessly.” Or, is it more of a “we had a good thing and we’ll see where we are at when I get back.” I don’t know.

I do know, however, that this Italian man I met awhile back named Oscar—yes, his name is really Oscar—found me on facebook. He was my very first kiss! He’s so kind and I liked him a lot. We’re going to see each other when I visit Firenze (Florence).

That reminds me….I had a dream about my very first boyfriend from middle school, Kevin. It’s really strange that I haven’t seen him in nearly five years, but that doesn’t stop him from infiltrating my dreams. Maybe he was my first love. I haven’t had enough experience in relationships and love to know what real love is, but Kevin could have been it.

This summer is going to be another summer of firsts. A new city, a new experience, maybe a new Italian boy, and best of all: some new fashion. I can’t go to Italy and come back empty handed!!